Thats Terrible A Cringeworthy Collection Of 1001 Really Bad Jokes

Author : Gary Rowley
Publisher : Createspace Independent Pub
ISBN 13 : 9781479241644
Total Pages : 114 pages
Book Rating : 4.44/5 ( download)

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Download or read book That's Terrible! a Cringeworthy Collection of 1001 Really Bad Jokes written by Gary Rowley and published by Createspace Independent Pub. This book was released on 2012-09-05 with total page 114 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A relentless barrage of zany, off-the-wall humour, 1001 jokes, puns and one-liners, plumbed exclusively from the innermost depths and far-out corridors of an extremely vivid imagination. You won't have encountered anything like this addictive little beauty before; not a swear word in sight, it would be equally at home in the hands of kids or grandmas, whilst still supplying sufficient ammunition to torment your mates into submission. Guaranteed to put a smile on your face, and no wonder with jokes like these: Mobile phones have been around longer than people think. I was watching this film the other day and heard Sir Lancelot ask someone to fetch his charger. I was considering investing in a Chinese distillery but decided against it. Whiskey business. I went to the waxworks but legged it when I saw this woman coming towards me, swinging a pair of giant blades. I discovered later it was Madame Two Swords. Michael Phelps and the Thorpedo: they think they're God's gift to swimming. As an ex-paratrooper, I definitely thought my bill for dental work was a bridge too far. I had a real bad accident at the saw mill. My other half says we should sue for compensation. I've just lost my job at the snuff factory. I was sacked for pinching. I walked into Leeds station and asked the route to Bristol. I said, is it Leeds to Sheffield, then Derby, Birmingham, Cheltenham Spa and Gloucester? He said, it's somewhere along those lines. Someone said there was a decent turn on at the working men's club. When I got there, it was an Arctic sea bird with a big, yellow beak. I found my hotel bathroom stuffed with chickens. It was hen-suite. Boy racers. They're the torque of the town. Every time it's nice outside, there's this American pop duo that stand on a street corner, giving money away. It's Sunny and Share.

Author : Gary Rowley
Publisher : Createspace Independent Pub
ISBN 13 : 9781481162456
Total Pages : 122 pages
Book Rating : 4.54/5 ( download)

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Download or read book That's Terrible 2: a Cringeworthy Collection of 1001 Even Worse Jokes written by Gary Rowley and published by Createspace Independent Pub. This book was released on 2012-12-07 with total page 122 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Back by popular demand: another rib-tickling collection of 1001 original jokes and one-liners - only this time even worse! Like its hugely entertaining big sister, this addictive little gem will have you in stitches from the word go. Plumbed from the innermost depths and far-out corridors of an extremely vivid imagination, there isn't a swear word in sight, appealing to kids and grandmas, whilst still supplying ample ammunition to bombard your mates into submission. Just like the first time, all you need to do to become immersed in this barrage of off-the-wall buffoonery is find a quiet spot somewhere then slowly turn the page, revealing ream upon ream of good, clean fun jokes like these: ET's been caught shoplifting. I always said he was light fingered. Animal rights activists are currently camped outside United's training ground after it was announced Wayne Rooney had injured a calf. I staggered out of the pub and straight into a fracas with a rag and bone man. I was charged with junk and disorderly. The wife asked if I fancied a trip to the Arctic Circle. I said, sounds cool. I took my car back to the garage. I said, every time it rains, I get this awful hissing noise. The mechanic said, I wouldn't worry too much. It's probably just the windscreen vipers. Ghosts: they need to get a life. I bought an imitation American motorcycle. It was a Hardly Davidson. My job at the glue factory, I've told them to stick it. I went in HMV. I said, what do you think to the Pet Shop Boys? The assistant said, they've a good selection of dog biscuits but the prices are a bit steep. Tardis for sale. No time wasters. I took my new DAB radio back to the shop. I said, the volume button is stuck on low and I don't know what to do. He said, try playing it by ear. The cat o' nine tails I inherited: I've flogged it.

Author : Kay Woodward
Publisher :
ISBN 13 : 9781407111124
Total Pages : 96 pages
Book Rating : 4.24/5 ( download)

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Download or read book The Horribly Funny Joke Book written by Kay Woodward and published by . This book was released on 2009-05 with total page 96 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A horribly funny book of jokes including: Gruesome jokes - jokes about goo Monstrous jokes - jokes about monsters Awfully funny jokes - jokes that are baaad Rotten jokes - slimy, smelly jokes Jokes to make you go 'ew!' - yucky jokes Jokes that go bump in the night - ghostly jokes Cringeworthy jokes - more really bad jokes Hair-raising jokes - scary jokes and many, many more!

Author : Sid Finch
Publisher :
ISBN 13 : 9781787830288
Total Pages : 96 pages
Book Rating : 4.84/5 ( download)

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Download or read book Little Book of Shit Jokes written by Sid Finch and published by . This book was released on 2019-10-10 with total page 96 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: My mate was selling a television cheap because the volume was broken. I couldn't turn it down. What's black and white and bad all over? These jokes! Groaning with silly gags, classic crap wisecracks, naff knock-knocks, poor puns and lame one-liners, this book will make you cry until you laugh.

Author : Milton Berle
Publisher : Crown
ISBN 13 : 0517587165
Total Pages : 674 pages
Book Rating : 4.64/5 ( download)

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Download or read book Milton Berle's Private Joke File written by Milton Berle and published by Crown. This book was released on 1992-01-28 with total page 674 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: One of the legends of show biz delves into his personal treasury of jokes ("The most comprehensive storehouse of 20th-century humor in the world"--Los Angeles Magazine) to present the most astounding array of one-liners, anecdotes, quips, and gags ever published. Line drawings.

Author : Gordon Hideaki Nagai
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1612435904
Total Pages : 118 pages
Book Rating : 4.09/5 ( download)

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Download or read book The Ultimate Book of Dad Jokes written by Gordon Hideaki Nagai and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2016-05-10 with total page 118 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A MASSIVE COLLECTION OF LAUGHABLE, CHEESY JOKES PERFECT FOR AMUSING DADS WHILE SLIGHTLY EMBARRASSING THE KIDS As groan-inducing as they are hilarious, dad jokes are the punny one-liners and oh-so-clever quips fathers never tire of telling. With this massive collection, no Dad will ever lack new material to make his kids facepalm: • A watermelon and a honeydew wanted to get married right away, but they cantaloupe. • After Humpty Dumpty recovered from his fall, he was just a shell of his former self. • Sign language interpreters have to lean sideways to translate something in italics. • Anyone with a wheat allergy that routinely eats pasta is just a gluten for punishment. • A chord walked into a bar and ordered a drink. The bartender said, “We don’t serve minors.”

Author : Hugh Jass
Publisher :
ISBN 13 : 9781387763528
Total Pages : 98 pages
Book Rating : 4.20/5 ( download)

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Download or read book A Book of Bad Jokes, Pitiful Puns, Woeful Wordplay and Ridiculous Riddles (Hardcover) written by Hugh Jass and published by . This book was released on 2018-08-27 with total page 98 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hundreds of jokes congregate in this amazing compilation of some of the greatest bad jokes and puns there are. Uniting several forms of terrible gag in one ceaseless, relentless volume, A Book of Bad Jokes, Pitiful Puns, Woeful Wordplay and Ridiculous Riddles is intended to be a text every aspiring or current bad joke teller would love in his library. Authored by known pun and bun master Hugh Jass, this manual intends to amuse and educate its readers on the art of inventing truly awful humor. Ample quantities of ideas and an exhaustive demonstration of the form used mean that you can not only cringe, but create your own horrific jokes. After introducing the book and its uses, Hugh takes us through an enormous combination of terrible one-liners and question and answer jokes. The conclusion of the book meanwhile is framed in riddles both ordinary and poetic in form.

Author : Johnny Nelson
Publisher :
ISBN 13 : 9781989971109
Total Pages : 160 pages
Book Rating : 4.05/5 ( download)

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Download or read book 1001 Outrageous Dad Jokes and Wisecracks for Fathers and the Entire Family written by Johnny Nelson and published by . This book was released on 2020-12-04 with total page 160 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Show off your comedic skills with these hysterically cringe-worthy dad jokes Don't you just love seeing your kids' exasperated reactions after an expertly delivered one-liner? Isn't it incredibly satisfying to provoke eyerolls with your intentionally cheesy puns? The stereotypically silly dad joke is the hallmark of every fun dad. Utterly uncool, perplexingly amusing, and painfully funny, they're guaranteed to induce both groans and guffaws from anyone who hears them. You can count on your reliable wisecracks to liven up any gathering and cheer up any mood. But if you've been telling the same old quips for the past years, why not update your repertoire with this collection of brilliantly lame, but ridiculously funny dad jokes? In 1001 Outrageous Dad Jokes and Wisecracks for Fathers and the Entire Family, you will discover: Corny dad jokes that are so bad, they're terribly good! Over 1,000 rib-ticklers to restock your arsenal of cheesy wisecracks Groan-inducing one-liners that only dads can get away with Cleverly witty quips to ease the tension in any situation, no matter how awkward Ingenious wordplay that will get your family's brains ticking and their sides aching with laughter The pun-niest lines that are sure to elicit laughs, even from the most humorless member of the family Entertaining trivia about famous fathers - find out how much you have in common with these celebrity dads And much more. Everyone just loves to hate on dad jokes. That's what makes them so irresistible. The grimaces and giggles you get from telling them makes delivering the jokes as much fun as hearing them. No wonder dads have stubbornly kept dad jokes alive, even after their wives and children have repeatedly told them to stop. Carry on the tradition of hilariously terrible dad jokes and leave your family in stitches. If you're looking for the perfect puns that are guaranteed to garner exasperated eyerolls and unbridled laughter from the entire family, then scroll up and click the "Add to Cart" button right now.

Author : Editors of Cider Mill Press
Publisher : Simon and Schuster
ISBN 13 : 1646431359
Total Pages : 286 pages
Book Rating : 4.59/5 ( download)

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Download or read book The World's Greatest Dad Jokes: The Complete Collection (The Heirloom Edition) written by Editors of Cider Mill Press and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2021-05-25 with total page 286 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The complete collection of the World's Greatest Dad Jokes is here, with more puns, quips, and corny one-liners than ever that are sure to get eyes rolling Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe The World's Greatest Dad Jokes: The Complete Collection is here, with more puns, quips, and corny one-liners than ever that are sure to get eyes rolling. With hundreds of jokes that will make you groan--then make you smile. This book is jam-packed with clever quips and unbearable wisecracks that are so bad, they're good. Now the dad joke aficionado in your life will never run out of puns, no matter how much you might want them to. The perfect gift for the dad who thinks he's heard them all, this book is sure to add even more jokes to his repertoire, for better or worse.

Author : Johnny Nelson
Publisher : Independently Published
ISBN 13 :
Total Pages : 160 pages
Book Rating : 4.31/5 ( download)

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Download or read book 1001 Outrageous Dad Jokes and Wisecracks for Fathers and the Entire Family written by Johnny Nelson and published by Independently Published. This book was released on 2020-12-04 with total page 160 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Show off your comedic skills with these hysterically cringe-worthy dad jokes Don't you just love seeing your kids' exasperated reactions after an expertly delivered one-liner? Isn't it incredibly satisfying to provoke eyerolls with your intentionally cheesy puns? The stereotypically silly dad joke is the hallmark of every fun dad. Utterly uncool, perplexingly amusing, and painfully funny, they're guaranteed to induce both groans and guffaws from anyone who hears them. You can count on your reliable wisecracks to liven up any gathering and cheer up any mood. But if you've been telling the same old quips for the past years, why not update your repertoire with this collection of brilliantly lame, but ridiculously funny dad jokes? In 1001 Outrageous Dad Jokes and Wisecracks for Fathers and the Entire Family, you will discover: Corny dad jokes that are so bad, they're terribly good! Over 1,000 rib-ticklers to restock your arsenal of cheesy wisecracks Groan-inducing one-liners that only dads can get away with Cleverly witty quips to ease the tension in any situation, no matter how awkward Ingenious wordplay that will get your family's brains ticking and their sides aching with laughter The pun-niest lines that are sure to elicit laughs, even from the most humorless member of the family Entertaining trivia about famous fathers - find out how much you have in common with these celebrity dads And much more. Everyone just loves to hate on dad jokes. That's what makes them so irresistible. The grimaces and giggles you get from telling them makes delivering the jokes as much fun as hearing them. No wonder dads have stubbornly kept dad jokes alive, even after their wives and children have repeatedly told them to stop. Carry on the tradition of hilariously terrible dad jokes and leave your family in stitches. If you're looking for the perfect puns that are guaranteed to garner exasperated eyerolls and unbridled laughter from the entire family, then scroll up and click the "Add to Cart" button right now.