Fk You Penguin

Author : Matthew Gasteier
Publisher : Villard
ISBN 13 : 0345527658
Total Pages : 242 pages
Book Rating : 4.53/5 ( download)

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Download or read book F U, Penguin written by Matthew Gasteier and published by Villard. This book was released on 2010-10-05 with total page 242 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Perfect for the Scrooge in your life—a profane, hilarious takedown of all things cute and cuddly, by the author of the blog sensation of (almost) the same name Attention, all you clumsy pandas, lovable puffins, huggable bunnies, and penguins that elicit ooohs and aaahs: The jig is up! We have lived under your furry fists for too long. There is a cute and present danger lurking out there–in the wild, in the zoos, and sometimes even in our very own homes. Spurred on by the Cute Industrial Complex, these cuddly animals have taken over blockbuster films, inspirational posters, and computer desktops everywhere, further weakening the innocent civilians who are beguiled by these fuzzy frauds. But you are stronger than them, aren’t you? Those soft bellies and wet noses are no match for you–and their free ride has just come to an end. F U, Penguin is the rallying cry for those who choose to fight these power-hungry cute-mongers. Loaded with color photographs and hilarious commentary, this book will have you laughing out loud while it simultaneously saves you from the tragic fate of tossing yarn with big-eyed kittens and bottle-nursing baby pandas forever. ___________________________ "Finally, a book for the rest of us! Most animals go about our business without playing to the audience like the elitists exposed in these chapters.I wasn't sure how many more times I could hear about those great penguins and pandas and kittens before I started eating people... well, more people, anyway."—Jerry the Shark "Penguins killed my parents, and they would not hesitate to kill me. I thank the Crustacean God for Matthew Gasteier, a true saint and a decent human being in a world filled with heartless penguin accomplices."—Dennis the Krill "It's all true. We're the worst."—Anonymous Penguin "The average dolphin is far beyond this level of vulgarity, but I could see how this would be a very enjoyable book for humans. I should remember to hand these out to some of my slower relatives at the common ancestor reunion."—Edward the Dolphin "Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, this style of book is not something we are currently looking for. However, we wish you the best of luck with your human publishers!"—Danielle the Bear, Editor-in-Chief, Random Cave Publishing

Author : Matthew Gasteier
Publisher : HarperCollins UK
ISBN 13 : 0007325517
Total Pages : 242 pages
Book Rating : 4.11/5 ( download)

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Download or read book F**k You, Penguin written by Matthew Gasteier and published by HarperCollins UK. This book was released on 2009-10 with total page 242 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Penguins. One of the biggest beneficiaries of the Cute Industrial Complex, these waddling piles of adorable blubber have had a free ride for too long.F U, Penguin is about telling these brazen cute-mongers that they can't stay on top forever. They may think they have the world in the palm of their wing, but we can and will resist their powers.

Author : F. Scott Fitzgerald
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 0143136348
Total Pages : 241 pages
Book Rating : 4.47/5 ( download)

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Download or read book The Great Gatsby written by F. Scott Fitzgerald and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2021-12-14 with total page 241 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A collectible hardcover edition of one of the great American novels—and one of America's most popular—featuring an introduction by Min Jin Lee, the New York Times bestselling author of Pachinko A Penguin Vitae Edition Young, handsome, and fabulously rich, Jay Gatsby seems to have everything. But at his mansion east of New York City, in West Egg, Long Island, where the party seems never to end, he's often alone in the glittering Jazz Age crowd, watching and waiting, as speculation swirls around him—that he's a bootlegger, that he was a German spy during the war, that he even killed a man. As writer Nick Carraway is drawn into this decadent orbit, he begins to see beneath the shimmering surface of the enigmatic Gatsby, for whom one thing will always be out of reach: Nick's cousin, the married Daisy Buchanan, whose house is visible from Gatsby's just across the bay. A brilliant evocation of the Roaring Twenties and a satire of a postwar America obsessed with wealth and status, The Great Gatsby is a novel whose power remains undiminished after a century. This edition, based on scholarship dating back to the novel's first publication in 1925, restores Fitzgerald's masterpiece to the original American classic he envisioned, and features an introduction addressing how gender, race, class, and sexuality complicate the pursuit of the American Dream. Penguin Vitae—loosely translated as "Penguin of one's life"—is a deluxe hardcover series from Penguin Classics celebrating a dynamic and diverse landscape of classic fiction and nonfiction from seventy-five years of classics publishing. Penguin Vitae provides readers with beautifully designed classics that have shaped the course of their lives, and welcomes new readers to discover these literary gifts of personal inspiration, intellectual engagement, and creative originality.

Author : Matthew Gasteier
Publisher : Villard
ISBN 13 : 0345518160
Total Pages : 242 pages
Book Rating : 4.63/5 ( download)

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Download or read book F U, Penguin written by Matthew Gasteier and published by Villard. This book was released on 2009-08-25 with total page 242 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Perfect for the Scrooge in your life—a profane, hilarious takedown of all things cute and cuddly, by the author of the blog sensation of (almost) the same name Attention, all you clumsy pandas, lovable puffins, huggable bunnies, and penguins that elicit ooohs and aaahs: The jig is up! We have lived under your furry fists for too long. There is a cute and present danger lurking out there–in the wild, in the zoos, and sometimes even in our very own homes. Spurred on by the Cute Industrial Complex, these cuddly animals have taken over blockbuster films, inspirational posters, and computer desktops everywhere, further weakening the innocent civilians who are beguiled by these fuzzy frauds. But you are stronger than them, aren’t you? Those soft bellies and wet noses are no match for you–and their free ride has just come to an end. F U, Penguin is the rallying cry for those who choose to fight these power-hungry cute-mongers. Loaded with color photographs and hilarious commentary, this book will have you laughing out loud while it simultaneously saves you from the tragic fate of tossing yarn with big-eyed kittens and bottle-nursing baby pandas forever. ___________________________ "Finally, a book for the rest of us! Most animals go about our business without playing to the audience like the elitists exposed in these chapters.I wasn't sure how many more times I could hear about those great penguins and pandas and kittens before I started eating people... well, more people, anyway."—Jerry the Shark "Penguins killed my parents, and they would not hesitate to kill me. I thank the Crustacean God for Matthew Gasteier, a true saint and a decent human being in a world filled with heartless penguin accomplices."—Dennis the Krill "It's all true. We're the worst."—Anonymous Penguin "The average dolphin is far beyond this level of vulgarity, but I could see how this would be a very enjoyable book for humans. I should remember to hand these out to some of my slower relatives at the common ancestor reunion."—Edward the Dolphin "Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, this style of book is not something we are currently looking for. However, we wish you the best of luck with your human publishers!"—Danielle the Bear, Editor-in-Chief, Random Cave Publishing

Author : Deborah James
Publisher : Random House
ISBN 13 : 1473560500
Total Pages : 145 pages
Book Rating : 4.05/5 ( download)

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Download or read book F*** You Cancer written by Deborah James and published by Random House. This book was released on 2018-10-04 with total page 145 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: **As seen on BBC Breakfast** You are stronger than you know, more positive than you ever thought and you can still LIVE with cancer. Drink more green juices, eat turmeric, walk for three hours a day... Arghh, I wanted to scream, run away and tell every well-meaning person to go and do one! Whilst this book doesn’t advocate throwing all advice down the kitchen sink, it will empower you to do things your way as you navigate the big C roller coaster. Deborah James, campaigner and co-presenter of the top-charting podcast You, Me and the Big C, will take you through every twist and turn, reminding you that it’s okay to feel one hundred different things in the space of a minute and showing you how you can still live your life and BE YOURSELF with cancer. Taking you from diagnosis (welcome to the club you never wanted to join), to coping with family and friends (can everyone just fuck off sometimes?!), looking good and feeling better (drink the wine), and celebrating milestones along the way (drink more wine!), this inspiring cancer coach in a book will transform your outlook and encourage you to shout #FUCKYOUCANCER as loudly as you can!

Author : Danny Wallace
Publisher : Penguin
ISBN 13 : 0525503919
Total Pages : 320 pages
Book Rating : 4.10/5 ( download)

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Download or read book F You Very Much written by Danny Wallace and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2018-02-06 with total page 320 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Deliciously hilarious. If you care about people and enjoy a good laugh, I politely encourage you to read this book. Immediately." --Adam Grant, bestselling author of Originals From the brilliant comedic mind behind the hit movie Yes Man, a hilarious and pitch-perfect look at the rudeness that's all around us -- where it comes from, how it affects us, and what we can do about it You're not just imagining it: People are getting more and more rude - from cutting in line, gabbing on their phones and clipping their nails on public transportation, to hurling epithets on Twitter and in real life (including a certain President who does both). And the worst part is that it's contagious, leading reasonably courteous people to stoop to new lows in order to respond to the ever-coarsening encounters we face every day. In this engaging and illuminating new book, bestselling author and all-around curious guy Danny Wallace looks at the reasons behind the rudeness, and what we can do to stop it. His quest to stop the madness includes interviews with neuroscientists, psychologists, NASA scientists, politicians, and other experts. He joins a Radical Honesty group, talks to LA drivers about road rage, and confronts his own online troll in a pub--all to better understand the scourge that's turning normal people into bullies, tantruming toddlers, trolls, and other types of everyday monsters. Want to be part of the solution? Let Danny Wallace be your smart and funny guide.

Author : Tara Schuster
Publisher : Dial Press
ISBN 13 : 0525509895
Total Pages : 352 pages
Book Rating : 4.99/5 ( download)

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Download or read book Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies written by Tara Schuster and published by Dial Press. This book was released on 2020-02-18 with total page 352 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Brutally honest, often hilarious, hard-won lessons in learning to love and care for yourself from a former vice president at Comedy Central who was called “ahead of her time” by Jordan Peele “You’re going to want Tara Schuster to become your new best friend.”—Glennon Doyle, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Untamed “Compelling, persuasive, and useful no matter where you are in your life.”—Chelsea Handler, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Life Will Be the Death of Me By the time she was in her late twenties, Tara Schuster was a rising TV executive who had worked for The Daily Show with Jon Stewart and helped launch Key & Peele to viral superstardom. By all appearances, she had mastered being a grown-up. But beneath that veneer of success, she was a chronically anxious, self-medicating mess. No one knew that her road to adulthood had been paved with depression, anxiety, and shame, owing in large part to her minimally parented upbringing. She realized she’d hit rock bottom when she drunk-dialed her therapist pleading for help. Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies is the story of Tara’s path to re-parenting herself and becoming a “ninja of self-love.” Through simple, daily rituals, Tara transformed her mind, body, and relationships, and shows how to • fake gratitude until you actually feel gratitude • excavate your emotional wounds and heal them with kindness • identify your self-limiting beliefs, kick them to the curb, and start living a life you choose • silence your inner frenemy and shield yourself from self-criticism • carve out time each morning to start your day empowered, inspired, and ready to rule • create a life you truly, totally f*cking LOVE This is the book Tara wished someone had given her and it is the book many of us desperately need: a candid, hysterical, addictively readable, practical guide to growing up (no matter where you are in life) and learning to love yourself in a non-throw-up-in-your-mouth-it’s-so-cheesy way.

Author : Ron Cey
Publisher : Triumph Books
ISBN 13 : 1637274416
Total Pages : 199 pages
Book Rating : 4.15/5 ( download)

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Download or read book Penguin Power written by Ron Cey and published by Triumph Books. This book was released on 2023-06-13 with total page 199 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Mention "The Penguin" to any Dodgers fan and you're sure to evoke not just memories of the beloved third baseman Ron Cey, but also of the glory years of modern Dodgers baseball, a rollicking run through the '70s and '80s highlighted by the loquacious Tommy Lasorda, Fernandomania, a historic infield anchored by Cey, and an unforgettable 1981 World Series title. In Penguin Power: Dodger Blue, Hollywood Lights, and a One-in-a-Million Big League Journey, "The Penguin" Ron Cey and veteran Dodgers scribe Ken Gurnick take fans on an amazing ride from Cey's formative years in the Pacific Northwest through his stardom on and off the field in Los Angeles and beyond. As part of the longest running infield in MLB history, six-time All Star and 1981 co-World Series MVP Cey joined Steve Garvey, Davey Lopes, and Bill Russell to help the Dodgers triumph after years of postseason heartbreak, and bring the first World Series back to Los Angeles since Sandy Koufax and the Boys of Summer of 1965. Featuring charming stories from Cey's time in a memorable clubhouse alongside Dodger legends Lasorda, Garvey, and Fernando Valenzuela, with Vin Scully and Jaime JarrÍn in the booth, as well as tales of the life of a star during a magical time in Los Angeles, Penguin Power is a must-read for fans of an unforgettable era of Dodgers baseball.

Author : Penguin
Publisher : National Geographic Books
ISBN 13 : 0141044667
Total Pages : 0 pages
Book Rating : 4.68/5 ( download)

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Download or read book Postcards from Penguin written by Penguin and published by National Geographic Books. This book was released on 2010-09-15 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A collection of 100 postcards, each featuring a different and iconic Penguin book jacket. From classics to crime, here are over seventy years of quintessentially British design in one box. In 1935 Allen Lane stood on a platform at Exeter railway station, looking for a good book for the journey to London. His disappointment at the poor range of paperbacks on offer led him to found Penguin Books. The quality paperback had arrived. Declaring that 'good design is no more expensive than bad', Lane was adamant that his Penguin paperbacks should cost no more than a packet of cigarettes, but that they should always look distinctive. Ever since then, from their original - now world-famous - look featuring three bold horizontal stripes, through many different stylish, inventive and iconic cover designs, Penguin's paperback jackets have been a constantly evolving part of Britain's culture. And whether they're for classics, crime, reference or prize-winning novels, they still follow Allen Lane's original design mantra. Sometimes, you definitely should judge a book by its cover.

Author : Peter Smith
Publisher : Penguin UK
ISBN 13 : 0241434602
Total Pages : 336 pages
Book Rating : 4.04/5 ( download)

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Download or read book Bad Buying written by Peter Smith and published by Penguin UK. This book was released on 2020-10-08 with total page 336 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "A fascinating litany of the mistakes that can happen when buyers get it wrong" - Luke Johnson, The Sunday Times "Packed full with amazing examples' Jeremy Vine, BBC Radio 2 "Colossal, costly disasters could be averted if those holding the purse strings read this book. - The Times In this hilarious, fascinating and insightful expose, industry insider Peter Smith reveals the massive blunders and dodgy dealings taking place around the world as private companies and public sector bodies buy goods and services. A recent report showed that over 90% of procurement projects fail. So, why are so many billions wasted on ineptitude, mismanagement and, in some cases, fraud? By turns an entertaining account of some of the worst procurement scams in history and also a resounding lesson in how not to operate, Bad Buying offers clear and practical advice on how to avoid embarrassing mistakes, minimise needless waste and make sound, strategic procurement decisions on your next initiative. 'Had this been published pre-Covid, some of the recent f*ck-ups and waste might have been avoided. It's a must read for the public and private sector alike' Lt-Gen. Sir Andrew Gregory, SSAFA: The Armed Forces Charity 'Hilarious, enlightening and brilliant....This book will make you think twice about buying anything - but do buy this' Antonio Weiss, bestselling author of 101 Business Ideas That Will Change the Way you Work, and Director, The PSC